Dearest Greenland Target,
Hi, my name is Katie. First time fan mailer. Long time shopper. I am writing to express some concern over what’s been happening at your store over the last few weeks. You know, the changes? The problem is, I don’t like change. In fact, I hate change.
Inside of your sliding doors, Greenland Target, just beyond those giant red concrete balls, are so many changes.
I counted on you to be my constant. My North Star (bucks). My compass (or at least where could purchase a compass and seriously anything else I needed). Now, you’re changing.
Renovation, remodeling, growth, development, evolution, innovation. Call it what you will, but it’s all change.
Metabolism. Clothing sizes. Hair color. Friendships. They all change.
Every step of parenthood, from pregnancy on, has been full of change. Bodies change. Sleep changes. Priorities change.
And our kids change! Like, all the time. One month, we have a bedtime routine. The next? Nada. You think you know your child’s favorite food, and the next day (only after you’ve heavily stocked up on it) they refuse it.
Children grow and develop and mature. Which is what we want for them, as parents. But change is hard. It’s hard to want something that’s that hard.
But you, Greenland Target? You were a palace of predictability.
I felt calm and confident, knowing I could run in and grab Children’s Motrin, a giant pack of Up & Up paper towels (5% off with my Target card!), some Method soap, a storage container, a seasonally-appropriate throw pillow, and a cute pair of shoes all in a matter of 10 minutes, if I had to. Of course, I’d prefer to wander down your aisles over an hour of blissful Me Time.
But I could do it, if pressed, in a Supermarket Sweep-style shopping spree. Because I knew you like the back of my hand. And I knew that, once I was done, I could count on Jamie ringing me up with a smile, a cheerful attitude, and a reminder to open up a new Red Card account. “You knew I was going to ask you that, right?” she’d say. And I did, Jamie. I did.
Then just the other day, I walked into your store and was devastated (in that first-world problem kind of way) to see that things were amiss.
First off, Starbucks was closed down. (It turns out, it had been relegated to a tiny kiosk around the corner, but I didn’t notice that. Not in my caffeine-deprived stupor.)
Un-latte-d, I stumbled over to the dollar section but got distracted by the usually glossy floor-to-ceiling red wall at Customer Service. I wasn’t sure if it’s where I should make my returns or have a meet and greet with Taylor Swift. (No offense to TS—loved her new documentary, by the way). It was just SO FANCY.
I can only assume that behind that wall you’re hiding the shelves and bins that organize the items that have been returned by customers. Maybe you thought it looked messy and disorganized — that the clutter was best unseen by shoppers. But, you know what? That piled up, disorganized mess of unrelated items was familiar.
It was like a concrete representation of the never-ending to-do list I have going on in my mind. It felt like home.
More specifically, it felt like a glimpse into my guest bedroom. With my returns and items to donate (donate locally!) and who knows what organized in piles that don’t go anywhere until there’s a guest on the horizon.
Now you’re slick and put-together, like those Moms on social media with their perfect lives and tight jeans and bright red lipstick. No one can relate to that, Target! Don’t be her. Be messy. Be real.
As I began to browse the store, it struck me that you had music playing. Did you have music playing before? If you did, it was subtle enough that I’d never noticed it. Ugh, I really hate change. That music, it’s just a little bit too loud. It reminds me of shopping at “other stores.” Don’t get me wrong, there is a place for those other stores—but it’s NOT next to Lowe’s on 33 in beloved Greenland, NH.
Most importantly, I can’t find anything! Which makes me hate change even more!
Now you’ve put the pet products where the workout stuff used to be. I found vacuums in the very spot where I used to drop ridiculous sums of money on plastic storage solutions. There are BIKES where the BOOKS were. And some (but not all?) of the beauty care products are sharing space with the boys’ Cat & Jack stuff.
So help me, if you even think of touching the Hearth & Hand section, I will cut up my Red Card faster than you can say “Chip and JoJo.”
Okay, I’m sorry. I take that back. I don’t want this to get ugly—I just want it to go back to the way it was. We had a great thing going, Greenland Target. And I really hate change. It’s totally you, it’s not me.
Ok, fine. It’s me.
A Seacoast Mom