A few weeks ago, I fell deep into the trenches of “mommy burnout.” For days, my husband would come home to me crying, yelling, and feeling totally defeated by our two small humans. Overall, I was starting to feel the weight of life: cabin fever, pregnancy hormones, budget constraints, dietary restrictions (we participated in the January Whole30), and no foreseeable break from my kids. In essence, it was all snow balling into a giant disaster: ME.
So, in a totally random attempt for some solidarity and pity, I sent this text to a group chat of my closest mama friends:
Help! I’m in need of some serious recharging to avoid mommy burnout. I’m in such a rut. Tell me I’m not the only one!
After a few minutes, I got no response. Clearly, I’m a crazy person and now my friends know it and want nothing to do with me, ever again.
Then, all of a sudden, the texts came flooding in. And phone calls. And most importantly, encouragement.
In summary, responses ranged from, “Totally with you!” to “If that’s not normal, I am SCREWED,” to “Come over for coffee!” Within minutes, my mom friends confirmed what I knew deep down but hadn’t acknowledged: I was mentally exhausted, sputtering on empty.
Lesson learned: it took just a tiny drop of vulnerability to give me the hands I needed to pull me out of my mommy burnout.
Because I’m a lucky girl with great friends (shout out, ladies!), here are some tips for you to beat mommy burnout before you go up in flames.
- Accept Help. First, you need a time-out, mama. It helps build up those energy reserves that are so very depleted. Ask family or a trusted friend to watch your kid(s) for an hour. Go home and stare at a wall, zone out, and enjoy the quiet. If that’s not possible, take 20 minutes a day just for you. Make sure your kids are safe and occupied. And then, breathe in all of the space you suddenly have all around you.
- (T)WERK It! Also, shake that body and feel your endorphins flow! Put on some fun music and dance like Beyonce. Or exercise with other great moms from Fit4Mom. Even mamas have to shake their sillies out!
- Indulge. Consider what satisfies the desire in your heart to do something different. Want to stay up past your 8:30 p.m. bedtime? Crave a special, delicious ice cream cone (may I recommend Bloom’n Cow coconut cream ice cream)? Or, do you want to binge-watch Fuller House? Maybe you’d instead prefer to soak in a long bath while flipping through a tabloid? Whatever floats your boat, the key is to bring total awareness to that activity and enjoy every child-free second of it. Treat. Yo. Self.
- Laugh. In general, what makes you chuckle? Stand up comedy, fart jokes, videos of people tripping, song parodies, and cat videos all prevent mommy burnout. Finally, you get extra points if it makes you pee your pants a little. This video makes me ugly laugh every time I watch it!
So, if you’re going through mommy burnout, know that you are not alone. It will get better with a little bit of time and self-care. To sum up, make it a point to do one, or even all, of these things consistently and you’ll see your energy, patience, and smile grow!
